My favorite birthday present? A new house.

It's official...Scott and I are finally homeowners! I felt like a celebrity this morning, with so many people wanting my signature.

And, to celebrate, I'm finally posting a a few pictures of the house. We're really excited and Scott is already talking about what kind of lawn mower he wants to buy from Lowe's. For my part, I've made friends with the folks at Pottery Barn. I really should get a part time job there to help pay for all our too-near-in-the-future purchases.

We're celebrating my birthday in the new house (get your mind out of the gutter). Since all our furniture to date has been either hand-me-downs or cheap buys (which have all done their part well), we need to get all new furniture. So we have a date with some newspaper, measuring tape and scissors, to cut out furniture shapes and arrange them in the room. Happy 28th to me! :)

That being said, if anyone feels so inclined to send money as a housewarming gift, you can use our current address. We also accept PayPal.

Cheers to new homes and lots of debt! It's the American way, right?

Where the corn is as high as an elephant's eye

Well, almost.

Our weekend took us on an adventure to Cedar Rapids, Iowa. More specifically, Waverly.

It started at 5:30am on Friday, where we were greeted at the RDU airport by a 40 minute security line, which is unheard of here. After spending 10 minutes in line, Scott realizes that he has forgotten his ID. (how does someone forget their ID, you ask? It was an honest mistake...he had to make photocopies of it for our mortgage). So he runs home to grab his passport, but by the time he gets back and we try to cut in the security line, we miss our flight.

And all flights to Cedar Rapids, Iowa are full until 10:00 pm. Go figure.

The airline guy is trying to help us get as close to Cedar Rapids as possible. And throughout this whole ordeal, I felt like I was on an episode of Jaywalking. First, he spells Iowa "IHOWA." Then he suggests Akron (Ohio), Detroit (Michigan) and Cheyenne (Wyoming) as plausible alternatives to Cedar Rapids. Hmmm....

So we settled on Chicago, rented a car and drive five hours to our final destination. After a little tiff with the car rental agency, which I won, along with a free upgrade to a Lexus SUV.

We did get to really see a part of America that we otherwise wouldn't have, had we flown.

The family reunion (the whole point for this trip) was awesome. My dad is one of six and his oldest sister had 12 kids, so I have tons of first cousins I haven't even met, not to mention tons of second and third cousins. We got to see a milking operation, a tractor pull and some great fireworks. The weather was awesome and everyone had such a great time. Lots of fresh air, drinking, and just hanging out. Oh, and lots of fresh corn...delicious!

Lies, all lies!

I'm traveling again for work this week, spending time in good ol' Rockville, MD. In my hotel bathroom hangs the following sign:

Dear Guest,
Hilton Family of Brands is committed to conserving our country's natural resources. Every day, tons of detergent and millions of gallons of water are used to wash towels which have only been used once. Here's how you can help:

• A towel on the rack means "I'll use it again"
• A towel on the floor means "Please exchange"

Doing my part to "conserve our country's natural resources," (what about the planet's resources??) I hung my towel on said rack. That day, I found a brand new towel (and bath mat and washcloth) in my bathroom.

So I went to the front desk that night, explained the situation and said that I wanted to reuse my towels. They made a note to housekeeping.

The next morning, I once again hung my towel on said rack. Once again, my towel (and bath mat and washcloth) were replaced with new ones.

I guess that's about all you can expect from the family that produced Paris Hilton.

Losing our independence

I was flipping through the channels the other day and came across the movie "You've Got Mail." You remember this one - the romantic comedy that reunited "Sleepless in Seattle" stars Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, who fall in love over the internet, only to find out they are bitter business rivals - he the owner of the big box book store chain and she the owner of the small, independent children's bookstore.

In the end, love - and big box - prevail. Whether this was an economic statement made by the writers, or just a statement of reality, I don't know. But it got me thinking of consumers, the discrepancy between what we say and what we do, the Wall Street Journal and Seven Jeans.

Rupert Murdoch has purchased The Wall Street Journal. The wires are all a-buzz about whether the paper will maintain its editorial independence or if Murdoch will use it as another one of his mouthpieces. It's really quite sad that a paper with this kind of credibility will potentially be tarnished by bias. (I don't blame Murdoch, per se...I blame the Bancrofts for getting it in this situation.)

And earlier this week, Seven Jeans (Seven for all Humanity) was purchased by VF Corp - the same company that makes Wrangler. Not quite the same cache. What will the new owner mean for the designer jean brand?

Everywhere we look, it seems like the independent companies are being gobbled up by bigger companies. And I wonder, what does this mean for quality- for the quality of our newspapers, the quality of our jeans, the quality of our bookstores? Economically, I know that this is not all bad...with consolidation we get economies of scale, which means quicker service and cheaper prices for consumers, not to mention a friendlier effect on our environment. It means more exhaustive distribution and potentially better management.

But what do we lose? Do we lose editorial independence (the right to think for ourselves)? Do we lose brand prestige and uniqueness? Do we lose customer service and comfort?

And maybe we, as consumers, as to blame for the loss of independence. What are our demands, and can small business keep up with them? Do we demand that the Dow Jones, despite being a small company, keep up economically with -er- the Jones's? Do we demand that our small bookstores carry the latest titles and be open at our fancy? Maybe our big box ideals are driving the smaller businesses into the ground. We say we want independence to prevail, but do we really?

We can only wait to see what happens with the Wall Street Journal and Seven Jeans. I hope that a new kind of hybrid could emerge - one in which both strengths are leveraged. Maybe these newly purchased companies will prove that.

After all, it all turned up roses for Tom and Meg.

Because we love people who make us look normal

How I came across this gem, only God will ever know. I skipped the boring parts and went right for the juice.

From the Wilmington local newspaper, published this weekend:

"At seven o'clock on the evening of July 7, 2007, Crystal D. Ross and Richard E. Cummings, M.D., exchanged wedding vows. The celebration took place at the Hilton Wilmington Riverside, which had been completely transformed into the ruins of a Scottish Chapel. The reception which followed was a masquerage ball set to a "Phantom of the Opera" theme.

A lavish 15-foot archway drenched with red roses was the setting as guests entered the exquisite ceremony chapel desinged to portry the ruins of a Scottish Chapel. The chapel was enveloped with a romantic red glow from a hand-painted sunset on a canvas that stretched the length of the room....

...As the ceremony concluded, a harpist serenaded guests as they made their way onto the concourse which had been transformed into the lobby of a Broadway theatre, complete with a box office...as guests were escorted by ushers through a candlelit labyrinth, their first glimpse of the ballroom was a grand sweeping staircase and the bridal party, adorned with beautiful, hand-designed masks...

...Once all the guests were seated, the bride descended the grand staircase to the dance floor to meet her husband, who was attired in a black cape and mask as in "Phantom of the Opera." The couple entertained their guests by re-enacting scenes from "Phantom of the Opera" to perfection."

You can't make this shit up. Further research (because, let's be honest, researching this is more fun than catching up on celebrity gossip) reveals that her hubby (who was the one in a black cape and mask) is a plastic surgeon. More specifically, a boob doctor.

And because I'm a nosy bitch, I've included a few photos (courtesy of google) for full visual enjoyment.

Not that I'm an expert on the subject, but I'd like to clarify just a few things for the world at large.

Trashy: getting married at a hotel that has been transformed to look like the ruins of a Scottish Chapel.

Classy: Flying your guests to Scotland to get married at the ruins of an ACTUAL Scottish Chapel.

Trashy: Transforming your wedding reception into a Broadway Theatre.

Classy: Going on a date with your husband to an ACTUAL Broadway Theatre.

Trashy: Re-enacting scenes from "The Phantom of the Opera" at your wedding reception.

Classy: No re-enacting any scenes from any musical at your wedding reception.

I could go on, but I think you get the point.

A little more black than gold

As many of you may have heard - especially those of you who follow sports closely - our beloved Wake Forest basketball coach, Skip Prosser, died yesterday. I was shocked when I heard the news and I even teared up a bit. I know that sounds dumb, considering that I didn't actually know the guy personally - and he wasn't even the basketball coach until the season after I graduated - but what makes it so tragic was that it was sudden. He was only 56 years old and literally dropped dead of a heart attack.

What I remember about him is that he totally transformed basketball at Wake. He got the student section moved down so we were right next to the court (before that, the close seats were saved for the big-money alumni). He stole students' hearts when he delivered pizza to everyone camping out for tickets (no other coach in recent memory had ever done that before). He ate dinner and lunch at the student center.

And he was just a nice guy. So down-to-earth and someone you could see becoming a mentor or friend. Truly, Wake Forest basketball will never be the same again.

For those interested, here's an article from the Winston-Salem Journal. You can also click on the link to see a photo slideshow. Also, there will be some tributes tonight on ESPN and ESPN Classic, so watch for those.

It's always sad when someone dies. It's sadder when someone dies unexpectantly. And it's sadder still when someone dies who left a mark on a small part of the world and still had so much work left to do.

Friday, July 27, 2007
WFU community 'rolls the Quad' in honor of Prosser The WFU community began paying respects to Skip Prosser early this morning by doing something the beloved basketball coach loved to participate in - "rolling the Quad."

Prosser often joined Wake Forest University students on the Quad to stream the trees with toilet paper after big basketball victories.Rolling the Quad is usually a loud, jubilant celebration. This morning, it was quiet and somber. More than 200 came to the Quad about midnight to show their respects to Prosser, who died yesterday at 56. They included students, former students, faculty and athletes and former athletes. The basketball team was on the Quad at the beginning. They were joined by former WFU basketball stars Chris Paul, who now plays for the New Orleans Hornets, and Justin Gray.

"He was such an honorable, well-respected guy," said Lindsay Donohue, a WFU senior from Winston-Salem who wore her tie-dye WFU T-shirt. "I just wanted to come out here and pay my respects. Also for his family."

Prosser made students feel like they were a part of WFU basketball, and they said they wanted to roll the Quad as a sign of what he meant to them.Senior David Curameng of Fayetteville said he thought it was a cruel joke when Donohue called him to tell him Prosser had died. Then he was in shock, as were many others."He was always up even though our basketball team took a downfall a little," Curameng said. "He really did inspire the student body to always be active with the team, and he just made just made us feel like we were a huge part."

Many people had left campus by 1 a.m., but a few stayed quietly watching as light breezes moved the streams of white paper.

"He was just a great representative of Wake Forest, and I just felt like he played a big role in my life as a student, so I figured it was the least I could do to pay respects to him and his family, " said Todd Augustus, a 2003 graduate of WFU who works at Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center.

Steven Elliott, a 2004 graduate, said he also wanted to be part of the tribute and couldn't believe Prosser was gone. "I was a Screaming Deacon for four years. He provided so much entertainment when I was here."

Jason Carter, a WFU senior from the town of Wake Forest, was among a number of students who spread the word to come to the Quad at midnight.

He described this morning as the most somber Quad-rolling ever. Seeing so many people together quietly on the Quad was powerful, he said. "I guess in a way we're celebrating Skip's life," Carter said. He recalled the times that Prosser would come out to help after a big win. Prosser threw toilet paper on the trees and mingled with everyone else in celebration.

"Everybody's got a story of seeing Skip," he said. And he remembered what Prosser told students before the important games: "I'll see you all here at midnight."

http://www.journalnow.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=WSJ/MGArticle/WSJ_BasicArticle&c=MGArticle&cid=1173352158368

Three years and counting...

On Wednesday, Scott and I celebrated our three year anniversary!

I can't believe it's been three years...for the sake of sounding like a walking cliche, the time has truly flown by. Since it was the middle of the week and I had a big report I was working on, we just went to an Italian dinner. We're planning on beaching it this weekend and hoping to get some time together to celebrate properly.

I have to give props to our best man, Pat. Every year, he remembers our anniversary and gives us a call. Which is a big deal not only because he's a guy (and guys just don't do that kind of thing), but also because I'm surprised he even remembers we got married...he was half dead during the wedding from drinking so much. Let's just say he had to get wheeled out in the wheelchair at the end of the night. Don't worry - we have pictures. And I'm waiting for just the right time to pull them out!

Happy Anni to us!

WTF?

This week, I was in New York City for business. Our flights got in around 5:00 and, fortunately, we made it downtown and to our hotels before the steam explosion. By the time we heard about the explosion, it was in context, so we weren't frightened by the news. However, I read reports where people thought it was something on the scale of September 11 when it first happened. And who could blame them?

But, I ask, if that's the case, then what the hell are these people doing?

Seriously? You think we just had a terrorist explosion and you're busy busting out the cell phones and digital cameras so you can catch it all on film? How about getting the hell out of there?

People will never cease to amaze me. This happened on 43rd Street and my sister lives on 41st, so she was displaced for a bit, but is back in her home safe and sound. A big shout out to her for hosting me this weekend in her abestos-filled apartment! And another shout out to Carson for bringing us out for a night on the town...I believe that was the first time I ever boarded an airplane still drunk after pulling an all nighter. For the record, I drank my younger sister under the table!

Mysteries of the Universe

Today's random thought comes courtesy of a drive down the local highway. As I was passing underneath a set of power lines, I looked up and saw a pair of shoes dangling. We've all seen this before....and not just once. Many times. And I wonder:

What brings a person to throw their shoes up on the power line?

Is it a way to dispose of old running shoes, by whipping them around and around your head only to let them go at full velocity, climbing, climbing until they wrap themselves around the power line?

Or is it a grade-school prank played by a big, fat bully on a poor, skinny nerd, taking his shoes away from him so he has to scamper off barefooted, only to perpetuate the nerd's reputation?

Who's shoes are these? And what posesses someone to throw them up on power lines? I've never done this myself - or had this done to me - so it's hard for me to imagine the situation and to understand why this seems like a fun idea.

If anyone can shed some light....

Taking care of business

Everyday, most of us do something to take care of our health. Maybe we choose the salad over the burger. Or we walk up a flight of stairs instead of taking the elevator. Perhaps it's as simple as taking a multi-vitamin every morning. Whatever it is, most of us have our health on our minds and take steps - however small - to keep our bodies healthy.

We should the do the same for the environment. Everyday, we should all take steps to preserve our planet and make the world a healthier place to live in. They can be big steps, like taking public transportation to work everyday. Or small steps, like recycling glass and plastic. If, everyday, every one of us took steps to save the environment, the impact on the planet could be huge.

Scientists are in dispute as to whether the Earth's rising temperatures are a natural, cyclical event or man-made. Few things in life are black and white, and I believe that, while there may be some natural event going on here, it has, at the very least, been exacerbated by man. (Have you seen the pollution put out by China every second? There's a reason most of us had problems literally breathing in that country). As people who know and understand what we're doing to our environment - with or without the help of nature - we have a personal responsibility to take care of our planet. A personal responsibility.

Today, I walked to and from the grocery store, bringing my own bags. The total environmental impact of my trip was 2 plastic meat bags, to keep the meat from leaking. I could probably do even better. But it feels good to know that I didn't burn natural resources (gas), I didn't emit excess CO2 into the air, and I didn't add plastic bags to the landfill. And I got exercise! A small step, but if I could do that every time I go to the grocery store, think how many bags, how much gas and CO2 I would save over the course of a year.

We have a personal responsibility to take care of our bodies. We have a personal responsibility to take care of our planet. Maybe it's recycling glass, paper and plastic. Or grouping errands together to reduce car trips. Perhaps it's as simple as reusing a shopping bag as a garbage bag. Whatever it is, most of us should have the environment on our minds everyday and take steps - however small - to take care of our planet.

The quickest negotiations...ever

We gave an offer on the house around 1:30 pm. We received a counter at about 3:00 pm. Scott and I discussed a counter at 3:15 pm. They called to confirm at 4:00 pm.

Scott and I are officially under contract with a house and are super excited! Just one step away from true home ownership. To celebrate, we did a Tour de Pottery Barn et Restoration Hardware, just to get some ideas.

The home inspection will hopefully take place next week. Barring any catastrophe, we'll close on August 17th! All these years of tearing out pages from home furnishings catalogs will hopefully pay off.

Today was definitely a lucky day. I don't know...the number 7 just may trump my lucky number 22!

Round Two begins

Scott and I put an offer on a house today. This will be our second offer since, as you may remember, our previous offer on another home got rejected. (As a side note, that house still hasn't sold yet, confirming our judgement that the house is overpriced and the sellers are being stubborn).

I'm hoping the stars align on this new house. I had an appointment on Friday to go by to look at the house we got rejected on, trying to decide if we wanted to put in another bid and open negotiations with the sellers again. Our agent happened to find another home that just went on the market that day and suggested we run by to look at it.

It's really almost perfect. It's everything we want in a home - big, remodeled kitchen with granite countertops, master bedroom bathroom, great entertainment area, cute yard, in the area of Raleigh we wanted to live. It will need a little TLC - there are some things we'll need to do to make it cozier and more up to our tastes. But structurally, everything is there; anything we do will just be cosmetic and require some minor contracting work.

So we made an offer. Really, we gave them asking price, since we felt they were fairly pricing the home and we really felt like this was a steal. Every other time, we've stumbled across a house after it had been on the market a few hours, only to find it was already snatched up. I'm hoping - praying, really - that, this time, we're the ones who are doing the snatching.

After all, it is 7/7/07. That's got to account for some luck.

Am I the only one?

Just a typical e-mail from my mother:

How are you? Just on the news a pregnant woman - young newspaper delivery person - was found murdered with multiple stab wounds in Raleigh behind AmeriKing store near highway. Be careful especially when you jog. Don't jog at night
or in isolated areas. Jog with someone.
Love, Mommy

Please someone tell me that they have a mother as neurotic as mine. This is not an isolated incident. I get these e-mails on a regular basis...sometimes it's someone who had a pocketbook snatched. Sometimes it's someone's husband that has poisoned them. Is this what my future holds? One day harrassing my kids about crimes that may or may not happen to them?

And I'm not sure what the connection between a pregnant woman being stabbed and me jogging at night is. Maybe someone can shed some light on that one.

Oh, Amie...

Open foot, insert mouth

Background story: one of my sister's dearest high school friends recently got pregnant. She's 21 years old, brought up as a good Catholic girl (aren't we all??) and still has a year of college to finish up. My sister and she literally grew up together, meeting in grade school and remaining close to this day. My sister's friend is devastated, but decided to keep the baby, rather than having an abortion. And, despite her mother's pleadings, has decided not to marry the father, since she doesn't feel like he's "the one."

In general, I have to commend her. She's pretty brave deciding to have the baby, and to hold out for true love to get married. And I know she must be so scared right now, especially since her parents as also devasted and the friend feels like people are going to think she's "white trash."

The story: This weekend, while at home for the reunion, my parents and Scott ran into Barnes and Noble, where we ran into this friend's mother. My parents ran into the mother a few minutes before I did, and when I rounded the corner, they all seemed to be wearing serious expressions. Of course, you can imagine what was on my mind and what I thought they were talking about, so I decided to lighten the mood (read: make a complete ass of myself).

After giving her a hug and saying hi, I said "So I hear congratulations are in order!" Her eyes got wide, she grabbed by arm, and pulled me behind the stacks. "What are you talking about?" This is where I start to babble incoherently, the blood rushing to my face and my heart pounding. "Are you talking about what I think you're talking about? Do you know? Do your parents know? Oh god, I want to die."

So did I.

She came back and confronted my parents (who were champs, by the way) and started to cry. I made a grown woman cry, god damn it. I felt terrible. I still feel terrible. Thirty minutes later, the sniffling subsided and I think she got a lot of fears and issues off her mind. I guess when you're in a situation like that, and you're embarrassed, you don't talk about it with many people and a lot of those feelings get trapped inside. In a way, maybe this was a good way to let a bit of steam out and to know that there are people out there that support you and your daughter, and people are more forgiving and understanding than you may initally give them credit for. Heck, even I was surprised at how supportive my mother was and how she really provided some quick and dirty counseling in the Barnes and Noble.

It's been a long time since I've wanted to sink into the floor and die...or at least rewind time by a mere 30 seconds. This was probably my biggest foot-in-mouth moment ever. I still feel terrible, but maybe, in the end, it helped a bit.

I just hope it doesn't happen again. Because the next moment just might be when I blurt out to the friend: How in the hell do you get accidentally get pregnant in the 21st century??

High School Reunion

This weekend was my 10-year high school reunion. I was actually really excited to go and see faces and people, many of whom I haven't seen in ten years. The reunion was an all-day Saturday affair, with a tour of the school in the morning, a picnic that afternoon, and an evening reception. Since we took the opportunity of being home to spend time with my parents, Scott and I just attending the reception that night.

Typically, the girls were all dolled up and the guys just didn't care (or at least, pretended not to care). There were so many pregnant people! We're all in that time of our lives, I suppose, but it was a regular baby factory out there!

It was fun to see everyone - from my elementary school crush to great friends that I lost touch with to really good friends that I still keep in touch with. And it was interesting to see some people who's lives are just as you expected them to be - and others who certainly surprised you. I guess that's how most high school reunions go, though.

So how did I fare? In high school, I was definitely the awkward, gangly girl...someone who hadn't quite fit into her body - or herself - yet. And I think, partly because of that, I lacked confidence. Ten years later, I think I've found more of that confidence and am more comfortable in my own skin. I think my personality has always been the same, although a bit toned down from high school. I was a bit more crazy, neurotic and "intense" (as Matt told me this weekend) than I am now...I think with my experiences over the last ten years - college, traveling, getting married, grad school - I've mellowed a bit.

I've always found it interesting to see yourself through others' eyes. To get their perspective and compare how it's different from how you see yourself. This weekend, I got to do exactly that and think I've done just about alright these past ten years. My high school self would have been proud!

It was fun to see everyone and to reconnect and I'm looking forward to doing that again in another ten years. Maybe there will be a lot fewer pregnant girls that time!

One man's trash is another man's treasure

On Saturday, we had our yardsale. And we didn't do to shabby...$257. I was amazed at the things that sold - and didn't sell. Clearly, furniture is a big mover. Our old nightstand and dressers were among the first items to go. And clothes sold well, too. But the R5 golfbag went to Goodwill and the golf clubs didn't sell until the last hour. I guess our treasure was another man's trash.

But boy, does it feel good to have gotten rid of some stuff. My wardrobe has been cut by more than half and now you can actually get into our guest room closet. I think it's funny that while we want to reduce and minimize, other people were looking to add by coming to our yardsale. That's the beauty of a perfect market system, right? I'm all about getting rid of "stuff" and clearning out the clutter in my life. But even though we got rid of a lot of this "stuff", there still seem to be more "stuff" in our house. Do we really need all this "stuff?" I think our lives would be less complicated without all the clutter and nonsense that surrounds us.

With a new house on our minds, we keep on throwing things out and we keep an eye on not getting things that we don't need. I want to haul as little things as possible to our new abode and want to start fresh with clean lines and quality furniture, even if it means spending more and having less. Out with the old, and in the new (and few)!

Rejected

Our offer on the house was countered. We then counter-counter offered. And they rejected it. Which leaves us home-less.

I really had my heart set on that house. Scott seems to think that the fat lady hasn't yet sung...something about a strategy on their part. I think not only has the fat lady sung, she has left the stage. Although I do tend to get a bit fatalistic when my dreams have been crushed into a fine, chalky powder.

We'll see and I'll keep you posted.

In other news...my friend, Martha, has told me she is pregnant! Yay for new babies! Boo for not telling me for SIX MONTHS!! Just because I live on the other side of the country doesn't give you an excuse not to spread the good news. At least it's just in time for our 10 year high school reunion next weekend. Can't wait to see the look on everyone's faces! And I can't wait to see pregnant Martha! :)

Off to the races!

Scott and I put our first ever offer on a house today! It's a bit exciting and nerve-wracking at the same time. We really like the house - it has tons of charm, lots of what we're looking for, and just a great vibe - but we think the sellers are asking way too much for it. Even their agent admitted, in his own way, to our agent that he advised them to list it for less.

So we offered what is truly a fair price, but it's way lower than what they are asking. I'm just hoping that they see the light and realize that they really want to give this house to a young, deserving, loving couple. Because that's what it's all about, right? Not how much you get for a house, but who's going to take it from you.

Wish us luck...we hope to hear something soon!

Women are revengeful, spiteful creatures

I can say that. I'm a woman.

Scott and I went running at our favorite trail at Lake Lynn and came across quite a sight in the parking lot: a little sports car (well, if you call a Pontiac a sports car) had all four tires slashed (and when I mean slashed, I mean someone almost completely carved out the spokes on one of the tires), had its rear window completely smashed in (glass littered the pavement), had a "spiderweb" on the front windshield from someone hitting it with a blunt object, was keyed down the side and had graffiti written all over the car (not suitable for reprint here).

We came the conclusion that it had to be a woman because only a woman would be this revengeful. Plus, the graffiti had graphics to go with the written insults and I just don't think a man would have that much attention to detail.

And then, a few days later, I heard Carrie Underwood's new song:

I dug my key into the side

of his pretty little souped-up four wheel drive.

Carved my name into his leather seats.

Took a Louisville Slugger to both headlights

Slashed a hole in all four tires.

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.

Hmmm...life imitating art? Or maybe further evidence that woman are revengeful, spiteful creatures. And take their cues from other revengeful, spiteful women!

Save the Turtles

Like many states, North Carolina allows motorists to choose special-issue license plates. Perhaps you'd like to proudly display you're a Purple Heart recipient. North Carolina has a license plate for you. Or maybe you're a proud UNC-Chapel Hill fan. For a mere $49.95 a year, you can wear a tar heel on your license plate. (Yuck).

I came across one just the other day - Save the Turtles. While thinking about this great cause and what I could do to help save the turtles, I thought back to some international friends that went to school with me. Among the many cultural quirks they experienced in America, one of the most amusing to them was the obsession Americans have with their causes. We seem to have an organization for anything you can think of - Race for the Cure (breast cancer), March of Dimes (premature births), PETA (anti-fur), Pro-Life, Pro-Choice, Greenpeace, Cropwalk, Autism Speaks...the list can go on and on. So why so many causes and why does this appear to be somewhat unique to us Americans?

Perhaps having passion for a cause, and rallying others around it, is part of the human condition. How that manifests itself may be more a factor of environment. The Taliban has passion for a cause and rallies others around this cause. In history, the same was true for the Crusades. Maybe in America, where the government is stable, people have disposable resources and people are relatively happy, we find other causes to get involved in. We could rally around religion or politics, as you find in other countries, but since we are relatively happy in our current state, we don't want to tip the balance too far. So we get more granular. More, well, frivilous. And our passion and causes get more and more segmented.

Which brings us back to the turtles.

I would like to save the turtles. I really would. But how can I save the turtles? And what am I saving them from? And why stop at turtles? I would like to save the dolphins, the oceans. The air, the unborn babies (yes, I said it. So what? I'm a little bit country, a little bit rock 'n roll), the rainforests, the poor. Basically, I would like to save the world. Can I get that on my North Carolina license plate?

I suspect we're saving the world from one another, from ourselves. If that's the case, then our cause seems fruitless and much too large for any one person (or even a big group of us) to tackle. Maybe that's why we segment: if we can find a group of people that feels passionately about turtles, then maybe we can help save just one piece of our planet. Maybe it's more than just belonging to a group, giving money, and getting others to believe in your cause. Maybe it starts with each one of us, for us to save the turtles, the babies, the world, from ourselves. Little things we could do everyday to make a small difference. Between a campaign of one and a campaign of many, perhaps we can save the world.

That would be a cool license plate.

Another graduation in the family

This weekend, my sister graduated from Notre Dame. It's hard to imagine that this little person that I grew up with (we're six years apart) donned a cap and gown and is now going out in the real world. To do what, we don't know yet. But she's officially out of school! (What's the saying?..."You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here").

What I find so interesting about graduations is the wave. We've all done it. I did it last week. In the mass of families and friends present at graduation, we, the graduates, struggle to find the people we know in the crowd. And the family is just as guilty. They are waving like crazy to their graduate, somehow thinking that, among the thousands of people in an arena, their baby is going to spot them. And how did we accomplish this goal before cell phones? This weekend, along with everyone else around me, I stood on a bleacher, cell phone glued to ear, talking to my sister on the floor.

"See Section 110? The bleachers above the purple seats? Go up three rows. See me waving? No? Ok, now I'm jumping up and down? See me? Ok, see the woman in the bright pink shirt? I'm just to the left of her. See me now?"

And then the magic moment, when we spot each other. That click, that somehow, we stand out to someone. That someone knows exactly where we are, can find us, and that makes us feel a little better. That we are not just a blob among a sea of strangers. Someone loves us. Someone cares. And someone is always watching out for us.

Healthy, Wealthy and Wise

I'm not sure about the healthy part, given that I've been too lazy to work out these past couple of weeks. And given that I have student loans out the ears, I can guarantee the wealthy part is non-existent. But I now have concrete proof that I'm definitely wiser...no thanks to the $80,000 I just donated to Duke.

My wisdom teeth are coming in.

That's right, I'm 27 (going on 28) years old and my wisdom teeth are just now coming in. And no, I never had them taken out when I was a teenager, despite the urging of many dentists through the years. I don't like surgery to begin with, especially when it comes to the mouth or eye area. My adult molars didn't come in until my early teens, and the dentist had to go in and cut out my baby molars to allow the adult ones to come in. There was a lot of cracking and extracting. And bleeding. It seemed like major surgery to me. So you can see why I was always reluctant to have the wisdom teeth taken out. Plus, I'm a weenie when it comes to pain. And I went through enough of that with braces.

So now I'm teething like a little baby. Somebody pass the Ambesol, please! The bottom right tooth is surfacing and the upper right is just starting to poke through. So my dentist told me the bad news...that I need to have them taken out. "Don't worry," he said. "It's not that bad." I may be a bit naive, but I'm no teenager. I've heard from my friends about the dry sockets, the drooling, the chipmunk cheeks, the having to sip food through a straw for a week. Don't lie to me. I can take it like a woman. Maybe.

The good news is that it's not an emergency. The doc said I could wait another six months, maybe even a year. So I'm praying that the new additions don't screw up the thousands of dollars of orthodontics my parents shelled out (thanks, guys) and that they stay clean and under the radar. I made it this long - the last thing I want is to have my wisdom teeth removed.

Plus, I'm kind of liking this whole "wiser" thing.

Finished!

I've done it! I've graduated from Duke and officially have my Masters!

The ceremony was yesterday and my family and in-laws came in to help us celebrate. The ceremony was really nice and then we had a little get-together at our place with our family and friends. It was a nice to way to cap off two years of hard work.

I'm also a bit sad that it's all over. I came to school a bit insecure and doubtful of how I would do among so many talented people. There were some low points during the first year, when I struggled to understand concepts and do well. Looking back now, I think I surprised myself. I'm happy with how I did and feel I learned a lot. I got involved in many activities and am proud of my accomplishments, even though they were small.

Most of all, I'm sad to leave so many friends behind. We're going to scatter ourselves across the country and it's sad to close another chapter and move on, with the hope that we'll all keep in touch. So I'm excited to be done and to start back into the real world, but I'm also a little blue. I guess that's normal, right?

Cheers to all my fellow Duke MBA graduates this weekend, and to all the other graduates who are ready to close one chapter and move on to the next!

Si, Senorita

We're back from our trip to Costa Rica and it was a blast! We had beautiful weather, despite going during the "green" (read: rainy) season, saw magnificent beaches and wildlife and had a blast with our friends Abby and Nathan.

We started our trip in San Jose, where we spent the night and and had some great Tico food. Then early the next morning we were off by bus and boat to Tortuguero, which is on the Caribbean side of the country. This area is very remote. We did a zipline through the trees, saw monkeys in the distance, birdwatched, and just generally chilled. It was so humid in Tortuguero - my hair has never been so curly!

After a few days here, we left by plane to Corcovado, which is the southernmost pennisula on the Pacific side of the country. The plane ride itself was an experience...no security, no ID checks, no cockpit door, no airport (unless you count a 300 square foot room with plastic patio furniture an airport). But definitely an adventure!

In Corcovado, we stayed at Bosque del Cabo, which was a beautiful resort. Not as humid here and beaches that were gentle enough to swim in. The shoreline was breathtaking, and we hiked around the area, went horseback riding, and saw tons and tons of monkeys, macaws and tucans. There was so much wildlife all around, and the food was delicious! We loved our resort - we stayed in a hut that was open air and looked out onto the Pacific ocean. The best part was the shower - it was outside, but private and you felt as though you were showering in the jungle.

Of course, no vacation is without its hiccups. The airline lost Abby and Nathan's luggage...for four days! Luckily, we're all about the same size. And Scott and I got a bit sick for one day each. But we recovered, the luggage was found, and we had a great time nonetheless.

I have to highly recommend CentralAmerica.com for planning our vacation. All our transfers were smooth and flawless, the places we stayed were great, and everything went off without a hitch.

Now it's time to plan our next vacation...

Cipro? Check. Chloroquin? Check. Bug Spray with 25% DEET? Check. Cost Rica, here we come!

Happy May Day!

Enough about Fuqua and cheating. That's old news. Let's move on to something more important and exciting....

We leave in the morning for Costa Rica! Scott and I have done a great job of packing a week's worth of clothing, toiletries, and other necessities into less-than-25-pound-bags. I even broke out my back-packing gear that I haven't used since my European trekking after college graduation. We're packed, medicated, Ti-Voed and ready to go!

Of course, I didn't forget my camera. I plan on taking lots of - what else? - monkey pictures to post on the blog! We're very excited and can't wait to share all our adventures and pictures with you. If I can make it to a cybercafe while I'm there, I'll be sure to share stories!

Until next week...

A little something to talk about

A few boards have gotten some chatter about the Fuqua cheating incident and a few papers have picked up the story. But only the facts of the case are being published, while non-students speculate about the integrity and reputation of Fuqua. So I feel compelled to clarify my thoughts and feelings on the situation.

Fuqua is brave. As some people have pointed out, cheating surely happens at all universities and business schools. But Fuqua has taken a stand about cheating. They could have swept this incident under the rug and no one would have been the wiser. But instead, they had the courage and integrity to do the right thing, regardless of the negative publicity it may have caused. That speaks volumes about the character of the institution and its students.

Fuqua fosters integrity and teamwork. The actions of a few do not reflect the character of the whole. We are a school that supports one another, whether it be helping fellow classmates find jobs, understand an assignment, or comforting them through a difficult time. It's part of our culture and is what makes us unique and our alumni network strong. What's more, we value teamwork in the context of honor and integrity. This means while we are a support system, we also are careful not to cross ethical boundaries, especially when it comes to cheating. This incident has shaken our foundation, and that is why it is not being tolerated by Fuqua. The actions of a few have violated our trust, but it will not violate what we stand for.

Fuqua is compassionate. We all make mistakes. It's actually part of our culture and is what, in my opinion, makes the United States great. We can fail, learn from our failures, and then rise up to succeed and be applauded for it. As I mentioned before, business school is a training ground, and better to make these mistakes now then when it hurts even more people. If those students who were suspended for a year choose to return to Fuqua, I'm sure they will be treated with the same respect and given the same opportunities as any other student. While cheating will not be tolerated at our school, a second chance will be given.

I love Fuqua. It was the best decision I could ever had made for business school. Not only have I learned so much, but I have made incredible friends, met incredible people and have a support system I can count on for the rest of my life. This incident has actually confirmed my passion for Fuqua, because I know that the school lives by its honor code; it's not just a plaque on a wall. And that means that the students it brings in will also live by that code. There will be exceptions every once in a while, but when that happens, I know that the school will take steps to make things right.

That's powerful. And maybe, just what the business world needs.

Here we go again

Last year, Duke made headlines, thanks to the men's lacrosse team. As I had blogged earlier (see post labels), this incident never really affected our business school community, since we were well-insulated from the antics of the undergrads. But now, this incident has hit a bit closer to home. Duke is in the news again, and this time, it's the business school students with the antics.

I've posted the article from the Durham Herald-Sun below. Hopefully this won't make quite the same headlines as the lacross scandal. I think this has hit us hard because Fuqua is a tight-knit commuity and most of us value the honor and integrity not only of each other and our school, but also of business itself. Business school is the training ground for (hopefully) leaders of tomorrow, and if we don't build an ethical foundation now, then we'll be sure to have more Enrons and WorldComs in the future.

I believe in celebrating different cultures, and I also believe that when you're in Rome, you do as the Romans due. And while there are shades of gray across cultures, there are some philosophies that remain constant. I believe ethics is one of them.

Last week, there were police officers tramping around Fuqua's campus. I went up to one and asked why they were there...after all, there are never police officers around our campus. They told me that the Dean had to tell some bad news to some students (the honor code violations) and, in light of the recent events at Virginia Tech, the Dean wanted the police there as a security measure. Anyway you look at this incident, I guess no one is insulated from the world anymore.

Fuqua students may face expulsion
BY BRIANNE DOPART
The Herald-Sun
April 27, 2007
Nine students at Duke University's Fuqua School of Business could be expelled for cheating on a take-home exam, according to Mike Hemmerich, the school's associate dean for strategy and institutional research.

Thirty-eight daytime business students at the school were accused of honor violations in 22 separate cases heard by the school's judicial board over the past several weeks. All but one of the 38 were accused of cheating in a third quarter class while one was charged with "a lying offense."

The charges stemmed from the outcome of a single take-home test taken by 410 of the first-year class's 411 students, Hemmerich said. Friday, the university's judicial board announced it found nine students guilty of "extremely severe offenses" while 15 were found guilty of "severe offenses" and 10 were found guilty of "minor offenses," he said.

Four students were found not guilty of violating the honor code.

The honor code, the preamble of which is posted in "any classroom at Fuqua" according to a statement released Friday by Douglas T. Breeden, dean of the school, is distributed to all students who enter Fuqua. Violations of the code include lying, cheating, stealing and failing to report those offenses.

The school's decision was explained to Fuqua students at a Friday afternoon session. Some students said they felt the punishment for the cheating students was not harsh enough, but at least one student said cultural differences might have confused some of those taking the test and therefore the punishment was too severe.

That student was putting up a poster, which read: "9 EXPULSION is all we need??????? PUNISHMENT OR EDUCATION?????" It also bore a statistic stemming from Duke's own Center for Academic Integrity that says 56 percent of American MBA students reported having cheated in a 2002-2004 survey.

Hemmerich declined to comment on reports that the majority of those charged with the offense were international students. The university is bound by law to keep the identity of the charges against students private, he said, and identifying the charged students as international students could "identify" some of them.

He said that international students do attend a summer program before entering the school that addresses the cultural differences between the U.S. and their respective countries of origin.
Erwin Chan, a second-year student who believes the expulsions were well warranted, said the school's decision to take action against the alleged cheaters spoke to Fuqua's commitment to integrity.

"I think you should see [the expulsions] as a sign we do take integrity very seriously," he said, adding that the school's decision to welcome back those found guilty of less offenses was a testament to his school's compassion.

According to the study performed by the Center for Academic Integrity, which polled 5,300 students, MBA students were more likely to cheat than their engineering, law and education student counterparts -- a finding that led the author of the study, Donald McCabe, to urge business schools to address their significant problem with cheating last fall.

"The type of student attracted to business is exceedingly decisive and often will substitute expediency for ethics," said the center's executive director Tim Dodd.

Hemmerich said the school's new fall curriculum will offer a class called "Global Institute" that will address the issues of leadership and ethics in business.

For the nine guilty of extremely severe offenses, the punishment will be expulsion and a notation that will appear on their transcript for four years.

The 15 guilty of severe offenses received a lesser punishment of a one-year suspension, an F in the related course and a notation that will appear on their transcript for three years. The punishment was similar for the 10 guilty of minor offenses, but the notation on those students' transcripts will appear for only one year.

The single student charged with lying received a zero grade on the take-home test and will have a notation on his or her transcript for three months.

You Ain't 'Cause You Not

I was driving in my car last week, windows down, wind in my hair, when I was suddenly roused to inspiration from the words coming from my radio:

This is why I'm hot.

This is why I'm hot.

This is why

This is why

This is why I'm hot.

I'm hot 'cause I'm fly.

You ain't

'Cause you not.

This is why

This is why

This is why I'm hot.

Who said the great orators of our time are dead? There are few that truly compare to the velvety eloquence of Mims, wouldn't you say?

The greatest invention in the world

I'm going ahead and taking a stand. It's risky - to name the greatest invention in the entire world - but I feel strongly about this and feel that my vote is warranted. This winner is....

The washing machine!

How great of an invention is the washing machine? As I type this, I am simultaneously washing 2 pairs of jeans, 2 bath towels, 1 washcloth, 4 pairs of men's shirts, 2 tank tops, 8 undershirts, 20 pairs of underwear and 5 pairs of socks.

Just think how much time and energy the washing machine saves us. I can do laundry while I sleep, while I go out for dinner, or while I clean the rest of the house. Can you imagine spending your day over a washtub filled with hot water, cleaning each individual clothing item by hand? No wonder it took so long for women to enter the workforce...we were busy doing laundry all the time! Actually, I think I hear that washing machines gave women the freedom to pursue other activities, like a job.

Washing machines get my vote! Of course, without electricity, there would be no washing machine....but now we're just splitting hairs!

I think I'm going to be sick

As I was driving back from seeing a house today (yes, we have officially started the house-hunting frenzy), I was cruising along a lovely, winding country road. It's a beautiful day in the Triangle, and I was enjoying the drive.

But then, a squirrel darts out into the middle of my lane. I slow down. It stops and looks like it's going to go back to the right, so I veer to the left. The squirrel changes directions and goes left just as I'm going past and I feel the tiny bump under my wheels. I scream and look in the rear view mirror to see the lifeless body of the squirrel on the pavement.

Why is killing a small animal so traumatic? Maybe it's because it's this innocent life that was minding its own business until I came along in the Dodge. Or maybe because I actually felt the body of the squirrel through the car. All I can imagine now is the poor creatures bones being crushed by the car wheels. I know, it's morbid. But the whole incident was upsetting.

When I was in second grade, a group of us were outside during recess and came across this hairy caterpillar. We formed a circle around it and some of the girls were gently stroking its fuzz and watching it crawl around. Then this boy said "I'm going to step on it." I told him he better not dare. And then he did. Green guts went everywhere. And I started to cry. Really cry...so much that I think other kids thought I was weird.

But again, it was traumatic for me. This little animal, this life, that we as humans just callously disregard. I think I'm finally over the caterpillar incident, although it's burned into my memory. Hopefully I can get over the squirrel incident, too.

My DC Weekend

I never realized just how close DC is to Raleigh until I drove it this past weekend. I made it in less than 4 hours! The cherry blossoms were on their way out, but the swarms of tourists were still around.

My friend Kristen had a bachelorette party on Saturday, which was so much fun. One of my favorite parts of the night was smoking to hookah, which I've never done before. I never knew mango-flavored tobacco could be so fun! A few fun pictures of Kristen posing with her lingerie and of our beloved hookah. Everyone had a great time and I have to give props to Kristen...she did her fair share of drinking and still made it up for 8:30 am church! Who needs sleep when you have champagne and good friends?

While I was up in the city, I got to catch up with a friend I haven't seen since high school. We were really close back in the day, but as is the case with a lot of high school friends, we kind of lost touch over the years. Last December (2005), I had a b-school friend (who was an alumni of the same college she went to) look her e-mail up and we started getting back in touch. She got married in December 2006 and I was bummed that I couldn't go to the wedding. But we finally caught up in person this weekend! It's funny how so many things can change in your life and you feel as if you've changed with it, but in the end, you're the same as you always were. That's how I feel with Jana - she was the same person - same sweetness, same mannerisms - as always, but with a whole new life.

So now I have lots of reasons to get back up to DC...an old friend, a new-old friend, and lots of dead presidents!

Life is funny

Life likes to play with us, just for fun. Just when things get good, everything changes and you have to start from scratch again.

My non-Fuqua friends keep asking me if I'm excited to graduate. My answer: yes and no. In a sick way, I'm excited to start working again and to try to integrate the information I've absorbed over the last two years with the real world. I'm excited to be on a more normal schedule and not stress about homework or case analysis that's due the next day. I'm excited to make money again and contribute (significantly, this time) to our future.

But there are things I'm really sad about. I'm sad to give up my two-week at-a-time vacations. I'm sad to leave an academic environment where I'm constantly learning new things. But most of all, I'm sad to leave the new friends I've made.

Over the last several weeks (ever since January), our friends have been hanging out together more, spending more time together. For most of us, the stress of the job search was over and our course load lighter (or at least, we didn't care anymore). So we have more time to spend together and do drinks with the girls or potlucks or dinners out or paintball. Yet, now that we're all becoming closer and actually forging those friendships we made earlier, we're also getting ready to leave each other. So why didn't we do this sooner? But any sooner and we would have been too busy.

So we only have time now because we're coming to the end. And because we have time, we're enjoying our friendships more. But just as we're enjoying our friendship more, we're coming to the end. Isn't life funny?

The journey before Easter

This time of year is one of the most important ones for Christians. Really, this week is the crux of our convictions and beliefs. While I've always been interested in the history of religion, particularly Christianity (specifically, Catholicism), Islam and Judaism, this year I've been especially curious.

I just got back from a Seder (the first meal of Passover), celebrating with my Jewish friends. I wish I knew more about Judaism; it's like learning about your past to figure out who you are today. There are a lot of Catholic rituals that come from Jewish roots and I'd love to learn more about what we share and what our differences are. The Seder tonight did a great job of connecting some of the Old Testament stories into a cohesive history that explains a lot about the Jewish faith. As a Catholic, I felt closer to my own religion (and closer to truly understanding it) by celebrating a Jewish tradition and holiday.

I'm now on a quest to learn more about the history of religion...what beliefs do Christians, Muslims and Jews share and are our differences really all that different? What are the common ties? And how are we all interrelated?

If anyone has any great books or articles that they'd recommend, please let me know!

Alex, I'll take "What's Behind Door #1?" for $800, please

As of this morning, I am officially employed! Thank you to everyone who gave their insights and advice...it's amazing that the overwhelming majority of people really value the work environment over anything else. I guess it shows that, when you boil it down, it's more about the people you work with than about what you do.

I've decided to go with the first firm I listed in the last post. I, like most people I talked to, just couldn't walk away from the great work environment and the wonderful people. And I think the work will be interesting, too. I also had my very first salary negotiation, which was nerve-racking, but successful!

So now that the job search is officially over, what am I going to do with all this free time?

Decisions, Decisions

Not too many weeks ago, I was complaining about how slow the job search was going. Well, I now have four job offers and need a little help in deciding which one to take:

Behind Door #1: Is a small firm (40 peeps) with a main office in Atlanta and one in Durham. The culture is awesome - wear jeans to work, bring your dog to work - and the people are truly awesome. I would get to do a lot of international traveling (which I love!) and the salary is great. I would be doing market research, which is something I wasn't exactly looking for, although it could be interesting to try out. I would basically be a niche consultant, working with a broad spectrum of clients.

Behind Door #2: Is a much larger firm (25,000 peeps) that specializes in doing lab testing. I would be working in their IT area, acting as a liason between the IT people and the lab people, discovering needs and concerns and coming up with strategies to solve them. Sort of like an internal consultant. Corporate culture with very nice people. I would have about a 50 minute commute each way.

Behind Door #3: Is an insurance company (4,000 peeps) where I would be doing segmentation marketing and figuring out which segments are profitable and how to target and communicate with that segment. Corporate culture with nice people.

Behind Door #4: Is a small company that specializes in all-natural cosmetics (I won't say the name of the company as it might bias you to pick this company). Cool culture with laid-back attitude and a focus on the environment (it's one of America's most socially-responsible brands). The marketing job would be mostly tactical, implementing marketing programs and working closely with the brand managers.

All great companies, and each has it's own pros and cons. So I need your help! Which door would you pick, if you had to choose?

Costa Rica!

It's been hard to adjust back to school after a two-and-a-half-week spring break. So this past week, I've found myself daydreaming in classes and what better thing to dream about than our upcoming trip to Costa Rica!

From May 2-May 9, the hubby and I (and our friends Abby and Nathan from Chi-town) will be traveling to Costa Rica. It's kind of a pre-graduation graduation gift since I don't graduate until that following weekend, May 12. Plus, it'll just be fun to have a relaxing vacation.

We'll fly into San Jose the afternoon of May 2 and spend the night there. The next morning, we'll be shipped off to Tortuguero, which is on the Carribbean side of the country. The Tortugero area is primarily all rainforest and hopefully not very touristy. I'm hoping to get a ride on the zip-line and see lots of monkeys (of course!). We're staying at the Laguna Lodge, and I think it's going to be too cute!

After several days, we're flying to Corcovado area (in the lower pennisula) and staying at Bosque del Cabo, with the adorable thatched huts! Here, I think we'll get a lot of beach time. And hopefully see lots of monkeys!

I'm so excited...I've even been eyeing some new swimsuits at J Crew. Just six more weeks...

The Spunk is Back

I was a little crazy in high school. Imagine how a highly-caffeinated, neurotic person would act, and that was me...all the time. In college, I mellowed out a bit. But I was still a bit neurotic (blamed partly on my mother) and still a touch crazy.

But in the years after graduation, I think I lost some of that "spunk." Maybe it was because I got busy with work. Or maybe because I lost some of that as I matured. I used to be "that person" who would start talking with you in the grocery line for no reason and I was happy all the time, but some of that went away.

That continued even last year during grad school. I noticed I was less outgoing, a little more shy, a little less comfortable in my own skin.

But over the last several months, and especially during this second year at grad school, the "spunk" is returning. Without consciously thinking about it, I'm randomly talking to people at the Krispy Kreme. I feel happier and am really comfortable with who I am. Maybe it's a bit of confidence with graduating from school. Maybe it's the weather. Maybe it's the fact that I know my hard work is paying off (did I mention I have some offers to choose from??).

In any case, I'm excited to be back. I feel that I've regained a part of me that was silent for awhile. I don't think I'll quite regain my high school nickname of "Crazy Laura" anytime soon (which is probably a good thing for all involved), but I'm the happiest I've been in a long time. And I hope that spunk is here to stay!

Free the Duke 3? Puhlease.

If you've been following the Duke Lacrosse scandal lately, you know that the rape charges against the Duke Lacrosse players have been dropped. The only charge that remains in a kidnapping charge, which is anticipated to also be dismissed.

Sales of Duke Lacrosse t-shirts have increased by over 8,000% at the Duke bookstore (that's not an exaggeration) and students are wearing blue bracelets that read "Free the Duke 3. 6 13 45" (the numbers being their jersey numbers.) I saw a bumper sticker on a car the other day, which had the same slogan, along with the website www.disbarnifong.com.

I can't help but think this is a little like dancing on a grave. Sure, evidence overwhelming supports the case that the girl in question was lying. And Nifong probably acting unethically in presenting his case. But while these boys may not have done anything illegal, they are far from innocent. Here's what probably happened: during a night of drunken debauchery, the team hired strippers to perform. Specifically, they hired white strippers. Two black strippers arrived and the guys yelled racial and derogatory slurs at them. One of the girls got mad and decided to get even. Heck, one player has even been convicted in DC for assaulting a homosexual man. One way or another, bigotry runs in this crowd.

The real victims in this case are the future rape and assault victims. What girl, white or black, is going to be taken seriously now if she comes forward with a rape charge? Through this "Free the Duke 3" campaign, proponents are essentially intimidating rape victims and throwing a healthy dose of skepticism the way of any girl that may come forward in the future. And I can't help but feel that this campaign legitimizes the Duke Lacrosse team's actions, however legal they were. Rape, bigotry, and assault are not things to be taken lightly, but this campaign somehow makes them the punchline and diminishes their seriousness.

The victims are not Collin, Dave or Reade. The victims are anyone they have hurt through their words. And those who do not yet know they are victims.

You've come a long way, baby...maybe

Two of these Tab commercials are from the 70s, one if from the 80s. My first thought when I saw these was "Wow." It's hard to imagine that, at one point in time, this type of advertising was acceptable. In one sense, we (women) really have come a long way in changing what is acceptable and what is important to us.

But have we? Or is this type of sexism just hidden under the guise of political correctness? And what have we traded to get here? Do we as women still fantasize about being a mindsticker? Sure, many of us exercise and diet to be healthier and feel better, but how many do that purely for the health factor? Deep down many of us do it to be noticed by the opposite sex. It's all around us - we see women shaking their booties in rap videos and even drunken girls in bars doing things to get male attention. And just look at how "shape" obsessed we are...these commercial models in the 70s and 80s were considered sexy and shapely. Today, they would be characterized as "plus-size" models.

While these may at first seem a bit appalling (as they should), perhaps, under the surface, not much has really changed since then.

TaB cola ad 1982

1960's Tab Commercial

Hotlanta

I took a little road trip down to Atlanta this weekend to see my friend, Chris. He just moved down there this past summer, and I wanted to see his new digs...he bought his first house!

While there, we went to the Fox to see Spamalot, which was hysterical. I've never seen Monty Python's The Holy Grail (I know, I know...I lead a sheltered life), so I wasn't sure if I was going to totally get the humor in Spamalot. But I did - so funny and so well done. Well worth going to see if you get the chance!

While there's lots of great places to eat and fun bars and hangouts, Atlanta is expensive! Not only is the cost of food more, but everything there is valet parking. Plus, with all the cute boutiques around, you can't help but drop a few "dubs."

We ate at Varsity's (apparently, a Hotlanta establishment), where I had two chili cheese dogs. And in the afternoon, we went to the Coke museum, where we tasted Coke products from different countries and I discovered how ethnocentric I really am ("I can't believe they like this stuff in Italy! Gross!"...in my defense, it is disgusting).

A fun, fun weekend! (in the picture, L to R, Chris' friend, Brett, Chris' g-friend, Anne, me and Chris)

Sugar and Spice and Puppy Dog Tails

I was milling around Target last week, having already found the items that I needed but looking for items that I wanted (but didn't yet know that I wanted), when I wandered into the greeting cards area.

There was a special card section, announing "New! from Target." They were birthday cards, some for girls, some for boys. All the "For Girls" cards had My Little Ponies and rainbows on them. All the "For Boys" cards were Garbage Pail Kids' versions of balls (baseballs, footballs, soccerballs) with eyes popping out and green stuff oozing from their stitches.

What is wrong with this picture? I'd be fine if Target just displayed an array of birthday cards, without specifying if they were for boys or girls. But by labeling them, isn't Target just continuing the stereotype of boys and girls? Surely there are some girls that like gross balls, just like there are some boys that may love ponies and rainbows.

It's a little issue, I know. But my favorite mass merchant retailer rubbed me the wrong way. No more stereotypes, no more pigeonholes. Let's just offer the choices and let people make their own selection.

Lions and Tigers and...Monkeys?

CISARUA, Indonesia (AP) -- Call them the odd couples.

A pair of month-old Sumatran tiger twins have become inseparable playmates with a set of young orangutans, an unthinkable match in their natural jungle habitat in Indonesia's tropical rainforests.

The friendship between 5-month-old female baby primates Nia and Irma, and cubs Dema and Manis, has blossomed at the Taman Safari zoo where they share a room in the nursery.
After being abandoned by their mothers shortly after birth, the four play fight, nipping and teasing each other, and cuddling up for a shared nap when they are worn out.

"This is unusual and would never happen in the wild," said zoo keeper Sri Suwarni, bottle-feeding a baby chimp on Wednesday. "Like human babies, they only want to play."
The four have lived side-by-side for a month without a single act of hostility, she said.
Indonesian tigers and orangutans are both endangered species, threatened by rapidly shrinking habitats.

Conservationists estimate there are fewer than 700 Sumatran tigers still alive, while fewer than 60,000 orangutans remain in the wild. Around 90 percent of the jungle has been destroyed by illegal logging, poaching and cut-and-burn farming practices on Borneo and Sumatra islands.
The exceptional friendship will likely be short-lived, said veterinarian Retno Sudarwati, because as the animals grow up their natural survival instincts will kick in.

"When the time comes, they will have to be separated. It's sad, but we can't change their natural behavior," she said. "Tigers start eating meat when they are three months old."

The Human Body is Awesome

It always amazes me how life - any life - can start out with just two cells (or, in some cases, a single cell) and, almost magically, become a human or a horse or a carrot. A sprinkling of amino acids, a dash of peptides and there you have it - life.

Last week, I sliced my finger with a tomato knife while cutting, well, a tomato. It hurt like a monkey and I used a whole paper towel to stop the bleeding. I didn't do much to it - just wrapped a band-aid around it to keep the flap of flesh smooshed down to protect the wound. And now, a week later, it's almost completely healed.

How does that happen? How does the body know what to do? Or even that it needs to fix something? Without me paying much attention to it - I went along my way going to class, studying, searching for jobs, doing yoga - my knife wound healed all by itself. And it goes back to just the way it was before - no scar, no disruption in the fingerprint grooves.

What amazes me is that I don't even know how my own body does it; I mean, I must know - my brain must be orchestrating the production of more blood to make up for what is lost and the production of more protein - but I don't know. Are the mind and brain two separate entities?

Good stuff. Although it hurts my brain to think about it. Or is it my mind? Either way, at least my finger is all better.

A Little Green Man Named Oscar

For those of you watching the Oscars last night, you saw Penelope's dress that looked like it was made from a muppet. You marveled over the quirky "shadow people." And you heard that the Oscars made history by going green.

The Academy didn't give too many specifics on how they went green this year, but I was excited to see a influential body make a statement and encourage others to do the same. By bringing conservation to the forefront of everyone's minds, they set a good example to a celebrity-captive audience.

Granted, there is still some work to do be done. For example, it would have been nice to hear more about the Academy's greening efforts throughout the night, rather than just a mention by Al Gore during his presentation. And the story about the Academy going green didn't even make it to the front page of Oscar.com...I had to click a bit to find it. But a journey of a thousands miles begins with a single step...or something.

You can also click here to read the Academy's tips for the rest of us - what we can do everyday, to make a small difference.

America is Really Bored

February is just about the time of year when people start getting bored. The holidays are over, New Years' Resolutions aren't so shiny anymore and Spring is a long way off. Never mind that the groundhog didn't see his shadow and spring is right around the corner - it's still really cold!

But that gives no excuse for the sad state of media affairs lately. First, it was Anna Nicole Smith. Now it's Britney's hair. Really?

It's one thing for these stories to make front page of The Superficial or People or US Weekly. It's quite another when it makes the front page of CNN and MSNBC. Are we truly that bored with the rest of the world that we devote all our energy to Britney's shaved head? And why do we devote video clip upon video clip about her motivations? Someone who has millions of dollars shaved her head. Why is this more newsworthy than, say, genocide in Darfur? Or, say, the Chinese New Year? Or, say, just about any other event that's going on that has some kind of connection to the rest of the world?

I know us Americans love our celebrities. And I will be the first to admit that I get hooked on celebrity gossip (just check out my link to the right). But there is a line, and we have crossed it. Maybe it's time to break out those New Year's Resolutions again...

You are a Superstar!

Have you noticed how "You" is everywhere? First, You posted your own videos on YouTube. Then You were Time's Person of the Year. Next, You were producing SuperBowl commercials for Doritos. And now, You performed live at the Grammy's with Justin Timberlake.

When did You become so popular? Last week Fuqua hosted a Marketing Conference, where many of the panel discussions focused around consumer-generated media. On one hand, companies like Frito Lay (the maker of Doritos) love this stuff, because they are able to accurately target their market and truly understand this demographic. And it's super cheap. On the other hand, are we going a little overboard? Now I see that Jeep is partnering with Marvel comics, encouraging people to create a comic centered around a new Jeep product. Are we getting an overdose of You?

And when did this trend start, anyway? I guess it could be traced back to blogs, where people finally had a way of voicing their opinion and really getting the attention of big business. And then it mushroomed when people had the chance to visually show their creative sides, courtesy of YouTube. But I think it started long before blogs.

My theory points the finger at reality TV and, specifically, Survivor. Being the mother of all reality TV shows, Survivor was the first chance to give real people, You and Me, a chance at 15 minutes of fame. We tuned in each week to watch ourselves compete for a tiki torch. And as more seasons were bought, it wasn't uncommon for us to know someone who knew someone who went to school with one of the Survivor contestants. Which made the show all that more real to us.

And slowly, through Darwin's natural selection, we've evolved from Survivor to American Idol to blogs to YouTube to SuperBowl to Grammy's. Surely, You will start to either die out, or continue to morph into the next great thing. Maybe it should be We.

Because I like to ruffle feathers

I contribute regularly to the Fuqua Times, Fuqua's weekly magazine. This week, I submitted the following article. While I did contemplate hiring a bodyguard (as much for the protection as for the view), I was pleasantly surprised by the reactions. Scott was sure that I was going to burn networks, and maybe I have, but I've also received a lot of e-mails from people who agree with me. I had to share...

I Don’t Heart Duke Basketball

Welcome to ACC Country, where rivalries run blood deep and team colors are more sacred then religion. Perhaps the deepest seated rivalries in the ACC run along Tobacco Road, the 75-mile stretch of I-40 that starts in Winston-Salem and ends in Raleigh and whose history first began when tobacco tycoons RJ Reynolds and Washington Duke battled it out for cigarette market share in the late 1800s.

So, naturally, many people were baffled when this Wake Forest graduate told that she was attending Duke for graduate school. The question continues to pop up in interviews. And my answer is always the same: I have internal conflict. Because while I love Fuqua, I can never, I will never love Duke basketball.

However, by attending Duke University, it is assumed that I must love Duke basketball. The assumptions started the first day of FY orientation, when we were all herded, wide-eyed and bushy-tailed, into a room where we were taught several Duke basketball cheers. I stood there, fuming, with my arms crossed, refusing to participate. Or when I received dirty stares from those in the student section at last years’ Wake-Duke game in Cameron (granted, I was dressed in all gold, screaming at the top of my lungs for the Deacons, but really?). Fast forward to SY, where I get quizzical looks from classmates when I mention I’m rooting for Clemson over Duke. Does it really surprise people that there are many students at Fuqua who despise the Blue Devils?

While I could give concrete reasons for this animosity, it really comes down to something much more irrational – emotion. For four years, I was bred to hate our rivals, who include Duke and Carolina. And we were truly rivals, as the Deacons were just coming off their back-to-back ACC Championships when I started (something that won’t be repeated this year, unfortunately). Like any true fan, we smeared it in our rivals’ faces when we won and hated them when we lost. How can anyone erase four years of wonderful college memories, rooting for the beloved Deacons? How can you replace hanging out in bars with the basketball team players? This is my alma mater, after all. Nothing will ever come between me and Wake Forest.

I can understand getting excited about Duke basketball if your alma mater wasn’t a big basketball school. And I don’t deny that it’s an experience to be squeezed into Cameron, deafened by the jeering crowd. And yes, I camped out last year, but it was just for the experience. I’ve done this basketball thing all before so I just can’t get excited about the Blue Devils…except when they lose. So, Orientation Leaders, please don’t force-feed cheers to the new class. And let’s make Fuqua a safe place for those whose loyalties lie elsewhere.

I love Fuqua and I will be proud to call myself a Duke Alumna when I graduate. But I will never cheer for the Blue Devils. I am, and will forever be, a Demon Deacon.

Laura is currently petitioning ESPN to star in a “Never Graduate” commercial, featuring pudding wrestling with the Deacon, the Devil and the Ram. Hunky male applicants for these roles are now being accepted.

The Power of Brand

I'm just going to go ahead and admit it: I'm a dork.

This past summer, my treat on the train ride from NYC back to CT was to pick up that week's The New Yorker and read it cover to cover in a mere 40 minutes. The articles are interesting, the writing is fantastic, and I loved to learn about all the goings-on in the city.

I'm not a big magazine reader to begin with, especially with school in full swing. I didn't renew my Traveler subscription because I never got around to reading it. But I found, in the months I've been back in NC, that I've missed my New Yorker.

So I subscribed. I may be the only North Carolinian to have a subscription to The New Yorker, but I love it. I love reading the articles, appreciating the writing, and learning about all the goings-on in the city, even though I'm too far away to appreciate them. But it's just a short plane ride away, right? Plus, I like being the only North Carolinian reading The New Yorker. I feel sophisticated, educated and cultured. At least, that's what the brand tells me I should feel.

I'll still get my celeb updates on thesuperficial.com, but I'm also chic enough to read about why Lieberman sees himself as the Lorax. Now that's good marketing!

Baby steps

Inspired by the curmudgeon, I've decided to try to lower my electricity bill for this upcoming month. This past month's bill was $71! And we only live in a 1200 square foot aparment. Part of the problem, with the onslaught of colder weather, is that our apartment is not well insulated. If you stand by the windows, you can feel the cold air seeping through. So our heat runs non-stop. So, to help save the environment, and to help save for our upcoming trip to Costa Rica, I'm taking a few baby steps. If you have other suggestions, please let me know!

• Washing my clothes with only cold water
• Keeping my printer off until I actually print
• Putting my computer on "Stand By" at night and when I'm at school
• Lowering the thermostat when we're out of the house for long periods
• Shutting off lights when we're not in the room (I could buy those energy-saving bulbs, but I'll wait until the ones I have burn out)

'Tis the Season to be Stressed Out

There seems to be a lot of stress around Fuqua lately. The first years are just about fried by the summer internship interview process and are burned out from classes. The second years are stressed out because we are making decisions that will impact the rest of our lives.

Before school, our job and careers didn't really matter. We knew we would one day be returning to school and whatever job we held prior to school was just a bus stop on our journey. Our summer internship, while important, was just a way to postpone the inevitable decision. But now, NOW, we have to decide. And our decision is what will shape our future.

Where will we live? Where will we work? Am I choosing the right path? For some reason, my guy friends aren't as stressed out by these decisions as my girlfriends. Many of the girls feel torn between choosing what we want and what we'll compromise for. In many cases, husbands and wives want different things, but it's our husbands that get a loud voice. I don't see that in relationships where the husband is the student - he seems to make the decision that's best for him (and ultimately, his family). But why are we, as educated and career-driven women, forced to compromise? Why do we feel the angst of doing what is right for the whole family? Why are we the ones brought to tears as we struggle to make the right decision?

Perhaps, despite being as progressive as we'd like to think, we are still bound by an unspoken cultural tie in which the man is the head of the household. That he holds more power. Not that we aren't treated as equals, but we're also not the type of women to stomp our foot and demand that things go our way. Maybe we should. Maybe we're being too passive. Maybe...but I don't forsee any of my girlfriends who are in this situation doing anything differently.

Or maybe we're just trying to be fair to everyone in the relationship. But why does that burden fall on women?